Permissive parents live amongst us! They are many, they are everywhere! And let me tell you a secret about myself...

From time to time, I also have to chase the excessive permissiveness out of my parenting. Not long ago, there used to be a discussion about what style of parenting was the best one: Strict parents vs. Lenient parents.

Thank to some psychologists this quarrel is over once for all. Whoever is interested in maintaining the parenting style that will help their kids succeed in life, should pay attention to what I'm about to reveal.

Who won the contest? Strict or lenient parents?

Neither one.

The study of the parenting styles sheds more light into the topic and defines better strict and lenient. Moderation, as usual, takes the trophy. Let you moderation be known...

Psychologists have different names for the styles of parenting: Authoritarian(too strict), Authoritative (strict but moderate), Permissive (too lenient).

Permissive parents are usually very responsive(giving) but not so demanding(taking). They don't expect much from their children's behavior. Their standards and expectations are usually broad and they have a tendency to be too democratic.

Not having well defined rules for their children's behavior can be a sign of permissiveness.

The problem with this style is that children tend to have less respect for their parents when they are excessively lenient.

The children can miss out on important limits that are beneficial to character building.

As a result, they become less capable of facing life's challenges and so on.

If you think you are showing signs of permissiveness in your parenting, don't panic!

I believe you can adapt your style with some small adjustments along the way.

The problem with parenting is that most people think that they either have to change their style in a radical way or they refuse to change altogether.

But the truth is, as you focus on principles and make some adjustments, you will be living the essence of this powerful parenting hack!

Why isparenting style is not all black and white?

Because inside each dimension of a parenting style there are many levels. For example, the extreme permissive parent is really heading towards neglectful parenting.

And as you go down the scale, the extreme neglectful parent is heading towards abusive parenting.

Isn't it powerful to realize that?

Do you want to know how to start on the journey of adjusting you parenting style for success?

The secret lies in identifying your style first and your tendencies so that you can make the adjustments to make your parenting successful and enjoyable.

Ask yourself these questions:

• Do I have clear rules and guidelines in place for my kids behavior?

• Do I have a problem imposing limits or saying no to my kids?

• Do I let my kids off the hook too easily when they clearly disrespected me or the limits imposed previously?

It might help to also ask other close friends or relatives for help with that. Ask the ones you love and trust to give you some feedback on how they see your parenting.

As you become aware of your style you'll be able to find ways to adjust your parenting. Don't feel bad or guilty, though.

Embrace the paradigm change of recognizing your style first and slowly improve your parenting.

Believe, you can do it. How do I know? Because I did it.

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